Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
