i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
