So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
