how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
