i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize
