Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
