please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
