Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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