That's when you crack a 10am beer
we made out on top of his cat.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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