put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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