it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
