My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
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