Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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