We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
