jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
