I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
It's just like the Real World with babies
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
