yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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