She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize