Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
