wakey wakey hands off snakey
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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