If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
high people should be assigned attendants
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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