I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize