And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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