I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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