Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
