I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
