some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
