I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
