both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
