omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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