fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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