I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
