It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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