Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
