New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
