I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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