omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
