how do flat chested girls get laid?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
