oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
