he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
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