What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
