I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
