I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
love makes seman taste better
do herpes really smell.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
