What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
a search helicopter?!
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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