Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
