You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
