That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Randomize
