are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
