I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
