Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
